Jealousy (Is A Terrible Disease)
by FrostyFingers
Summary: Lizzie is jealous. Can Red make it up to her? - Set after the S2 premiere and somewhere in the future. [Lizzington]


**AN:** So I just had to go for a Jealous!Lizzie fic upon seeing that new Mossad chick. While some seem to have already jumped ship, I'm shipping Lizzington as hard as ever, because nothing's happened yet. I mean we just started S2. And really, that smile he gave her during their first scene together... that screamed Lizzington right at me! So I don't care what JB says or anyone else really, I just watch what happens on screen and right now our ship seems just fine. That said, special thanks to jackandsamforever for beta-ing this. I can imagine it was a pain as I wrote this fic after not having slept in days. Enjoy! And don't jump ship! Have faith in Megan and James!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything. If TBL was mine, there wouldn't be any doubt about Lizzington!

**Jealousy (Is A Terrible Disease)**

"Yes," she hissed. "Right there." Her nails dug into the skin of his neck under the collar of his shirt. Why he was still wearing the button-down was a mystery. Oh, he had no problem getting naked, but for some reason the dress shirt always had to stay on; but he didn't mind if it was unbuttoned, and she did had to admit that his chest looked good. She had yet to run her fingers through the patch of hair there. It wasn't long until she climaxed, tightening around him and throwing her head back in ecstasy. He pushed into her a couple of more times until he too fell apart with a low groan. Well, working with him sure had its perks. The man was talented; in so many ways.

"Oh god!" Both turned their heads towards where the gasp had come from.

"Lizzie!" Red exclaimed, his eyes wide.

There in the doorway stood the FBI agent Red had introduced to her some time ago, looking pale against the cream colored walls. "I.. I... oh god. I'm sorry. Oh god," the woman muttered as she turned and hastily made her way out of the room.

"Lizzie!" She watched as her employer struggled with the covers as he scrambled out of the bed. "Lizzie, wait!"

"You should wear some pants," his bed mate suggested, her accent clear.

He shot her a look as he quickly pulled on his dress pants, leaving the room in search of his FBI liaison. The dark haired woman laid back down, pulling the covers up her chest and listened to her employer call out to the younger woman; but it seemed as if he had no luck in stopping her from leaving. He trudged back into the bedroom a couple of minutes later, looking deflated.

"She didn't like the show?"

"Samar." His voice held a warning tone, and the former Mossad agent raised her hands in surrender. He heavily sat on the edge of the bed, dropping his head in his hands.

"Just what is the deal with you two?"

"None of your business," he practically growled.

"Tell you what," the newest asset to his team began as she got to her knees and shuffled over to where he was sitting. "This was fun... let's do it again. I'll even let you call me Lizzie," she purred into his ear, stroking over his arms.

He stood immediately and Samar almost fell over. "Why don't you go help Dembe?" He suggested, his voice cold.

The Israeli groaned but got up, standing in front of him in her birthday suit. "You know where to find me when you're up for another round," she told him and then walked off, swaying her hips.

Red took the disposable cell from his nightstand and dialed the number he knew by heart. He let it ring five times, six times, seven times, before acknowledging that she didn't want to talk to him at the moment. He would try again after she had had a chance to calm down.

Liz had walked in on them having sex two weeks ago and she was still refusing to talk to him. They weren't doing their one on one meetings anymore, and it was always Ressler who accompanied her lately. She didn't speak, didn't look at him, she refused to even take his calls. It was frustrating to say at least, and he was getting restless waiting for her to finally calm down again.

**THEBLACKLISTTHEBLACKLISTTHEBLACKLIST**

It was only a couple of days later when the two FBI agents were at one of Red's safehouses discussing another possible lead. Ressler's cell chirped to life and he excused himself, leaving Liz alone with the Concierge of Crime. She started fidgeting under his penetrating gaze.

"Lizzie."

"Leave me alone."

Just when he opened his mouth again, Liz's phone rang and the caller ID said it was her partner. "What's wrong?" She asked, just as she heard an engine roaring to life.

"Liz, that was metro, they have a lead and I'm checking it out. Stay with Reddington and -"

"What? No!" She interrupted, the thought of being stuck with the man made her more than uncomfortable.

"We need to know what he knows, Liz."

She turned and took a couple of steps towards the nearest window. "And you just leave me stranded here?"

She heard her partner sigh. "Look, I have no idea what the latest issue with the two of you is, but everyone's getting sick of it. So use the time to fix it," Ressler said and then hung up on her.

Liz held back a groan of frustration. "Well, fuck you, too," she mumbled.

"Lizzie,"

"I told you to leave me alone," the brunette snapped.

Red sighed. "Can we talk?"

"No." She started to turn to leave.

The man stepped closer to her and held her arms to stop her from leaving. "Sweetheart, please."

She struggled against his hold, making him tighten his grip on her. "Don't call me that! And let me the hell go!" Tears were already pooling in her eyes. The last thing she wanted was to be near him right now. She was still too hurt, too embarrassed, and she just wanted to be left alone.

He saw right through her angry facade of course. "Oh, sweetheart," he said upon seeing her blink back her tears. He pulled her into his arms as she struggled against him. "If I'd known about your feelings -"

"I don't have feelings for you," Liz interrupted.

"I wouldn't have done this," he continued as if she hadn't said anything.

"I don't have feelings for you!" She protested vehemently.

"Because Lizzie, I feel the same."

Liz stopped struggling to look at him, her eyes glassy as the first tears started rolling down her cheeks. "What?" She whispered.

A small smile graced his features. "My... feelings for you... are quite complicated, as our whole... relationship is... but that doesn't make them less true," he told her gently. "Describing what... I feel for you," he swallowed hard at that and shook his head. "I love you, Lizzie."

The FBI agent stared at him for a few long moments. "No."

"What?"

"You don't."

He looked genuinely confused. "What do you mean I don't?"

She tugged against the hold he had on her once more, but he didn't let her go. "You claim to love me, but you really don't."

"Lizzie."

"Because if you did, you wouldn't have screwed the next best thing that crossed your path!"

Red worked his jaw at her accusation. "Just what did you expect me to do? I didn't even think of the possibility that you might return my feelings. In any way," he explained.

She shook her head in disgust. "So you jump into bed with some woman because you weren't sure?!"

"Elizabeth, just because I am in love with you doesn't mean I can't be in a physical relationship with someone, because how the hell was I supposed to know that you have feelings for me? You hate me for all I know."

"You killed my father!" She shouted, and Red turned his head looking off to the side uncomfortably. "You came into my life and destroyed everything!" She could tell that he wanted to interrupt. "And I don't care if the life I was living was fake or not! You, as a stranger, came into the only life I knew and you destroyed it!" She cried as more tears tracked down her face. "And then you killed my father! You didn't even let me say goodbye, you killed him and then had the nerve to see me almost every day for months! For months without saying anything! You took away the only person from me that meant everything. The only truth I knew. The only love that was real!" Liz choked out, as the hot wetness mercilessly continued to flow down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry," he whispered through his own tears.

Liz was breathing hard by now. "How can you even say that? How can you say all those meaningless words?! Why can't you stop lying to me?!"

"I've never lied to you!" He quickly replied, leaving no doubt that he was being sincere.

"Is this just a game to you? I am a human being! And to you I'm nothing but a pawn!"

"No." Red shook his head.

"Means to an end."

He grabbed her arms more tightly. "No!"

"Just stop!" She begged.

"Lizzie..." Tears were freely rolling down his cheeks now as well, and he had to take a breath before continuing. "You're not a pawn, and you're definitely not means to an end. You never were. Sweetheart, please."

"How can you look me in the eye while telling me those lies?"

"I would never lie to you," he said, leaving pauses between the words, but Liz just shook her head, making tears fall off her face and onto his hands. "Sweetheart, please, I would never lie to you. If you never believe another word that comes out of my mouth, trust this: You never were, nor will you ever be means to an end. You're my second chance. My second chance at life. At love," he whispered. "I would never use you only to dispose of you afterwards. You're everything, Lizzie. Everything and so much more." A sob escaped her throat, and Red had to swallow hard. "I love you, Lizzie," he confessed.

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because it's the truth, because I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you."

Liz shook her head, her eyes wide and her lips parted slightly. "I... I can't breathe..."

Red dropped his head, almost touching hers as he swallowed hard against the emotion closing his throat and tried to control his breathing. "Lizzie..."

"You... you say these things, but... you're acting the total opposite of it... We were talking on the phone earlier that night," she started and cleared her throat. "You asked me to dinner, but... but I couldn't make it and then you... just... with her!"

He felt the hurt in her seep right through to his heart. "I never thought I'd stand a chance with you. I'm so sorry, Lizzie. So, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you." He looked deeply into her eyes, as one of his hands went to cup the back of her neck.

"Red... I... I don't know."

He moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue. "Just... don't make a decision right now. Please. I know you're mad, you have every right to be, every right to hate me. Let me try to make this right again. Let me try to be the man you want me to be."

He already was, were her thoughts, he was everything she wanted.

As she considered his words, she felt his fingers stiffen against her skin in anticipation. She nodded once and then leaned her forehead against his. The long breath that escaped him ruffled over her hair, and she felt him trembling under the hands that were now holding on to his sides. Red gently moved his arms around her to pull her into his chest and she came willingly this time, snuggling her head under his chin and she got to listen to his heart that was furiously banging against his sternum.

"I need time," she whispered.

"Of course," he said into her hair.

"Also, no more close... anything with that woman."

She felt him smile against her head. "Nothing."

"Not even when undercover."

"You're the only one I want to be under the covers with."

Liz couldn't help the huff of laughter that escaped at his words and she gently pinched his flesh. "That's not what I meant."

"It's true none the less," he replied.

She pulled back slightly so she could look into his eyes, which were still wet and red. "I need time," she repeated.

He smiled slightly. "Take all the time you need."

"I do love you," she told him, and felt his fingers twitch against her back at the confession. He swallowed hard and the smile on his face grew into a full-blown grin. "I do."

One of his hands left her back and went to cup her cheek as he used his thumb to gently wipe at her tears. "You're so beautiful," he whispered.

Liz huffed at that. "Yeah, I bet."

He smiled again. "You'll always be beautiful to me."

She leaned in and placed a soft kiss to his cheek then, brushing her nose over his skin. When she pulled back, she could see his eye lids flutter open and she was amazed by the look in his green eyes. A look she couldn't place, one she had never witnessed before.

"Thank you, Lizzie." They both knew he wasn't talking about the kiss, and Liz put her palm on his chest, right above where his heart was, letting it rest there.

After a long time of just looking at each other and watching the others eyes as if they could see right through into each others souls, Liz spoke up again, "I should go."

"Dembe will drive you," Red said immediately. He knew that pushing her into staying would only backfire on him.

Liz shook her head at his words. "I'll be fine."

He nodded. "Lizzie? Would you... call when you get home?" He asked tentatively.

"Yes," she promised.

He sighed and leaned in to softly kiss her cheek, and Liz had to resist leaning into his touch; or just kiss him, attacking those gentle lips that felt so good against her cheek.

"Goodnight," she whispered.

"Goodnight, sweetheart. Be safe."

Liz shot him a smile and slowly let her hands drift from his sides, brushing her fingers against his, as she pulled away and turned to leave. She risked one last backwards glance just before she reached the door and saw him watching her intently. The look he gave her almost made her run right back to him. But they both knew she needed time and he wouldn't push her.


End file.
